Friday, March 20, 2009

Public service announcement : Quik Quixote

You may be interested to know how my reading of "Don Quixote" is coming along. Well, I've finished two books of the twelve-volume set. So far, so good. But I'd be lying if I said it's all beer and skittles. The language is reasonably understandable - Spanish has changed much less in the last four centuries than English has done. But I did find it necessary to go out and buy a used copy of the Penguin Classics translation, which I am reading in parallel, to make sure I am not missing anything crucial. While it's not quite the snoozefest I had feared, it's not exactly a laff riot either.

Which is why, here at MOTP central, we are inaugurating, with this post, a new public service for our readers. We are slogging through "Don Quixote"; why should you have to? The answer is - you don't! Just subscribe to our new service -- QUIK-QUIXOTE -- and get the abbreviated version of this classic picaresque tale in convenient serial form. Note that this offer is of limited duration, and available to platinum MOTP subscribers only.

Clearly, it would be unreasonable to expect our readers to subscribe to a pig in a poke, so herewith the MOTP introduction, and summary of the first few chapters. Please also be sure to read the CONSUMER PRODUCT WARNING at the end of this post.


This literary gem of the siglo d'oro,
I have to say's been my bête noir, O
spare your censure, gentle reader,
I bet you haven't read it either.
Let's make a deal. I'll save you time.
Give you a crib in deathless rhyme.
A Cliff Notes version of the Don,
Cause Mick Cervantes does drone on.
So tune back in, my little cupcakes,
And watch this space for future updates.

Chapter 1.

Too many books; our Don's brain's addled.
So he decides that he'll get saddled.
His scrawny steed? That's Rocinante.
His secret sweetheart, Dulz the dainty.

Chapters 2 - 3.

Don sallies forth in search of fame.
Soon gets confused (recurrent theme
Throughout this tale). Gets taken in.
Thinks "castle", when he should think "inn".
Hilarious fun, with knaves and varlets
And -- pace, Maiden Aunt -- two harlots.
By chapter's end, our Don's a Knight
And off in search of wrongs to right.


A warning will, I hope, here be excused.
How much the reader -- you -- will be amused,
Depends on how you view a poor confused
Clown's antics. Are you laughing? Or bemused?

If it's the latter, here's a quick suggestion.
Just stop right now. Spare yourself indigestion.
But if your favorite circus act's the clown,
Read on, and I'll try not to let you down.

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