Friday, May 18, 2007


I forgot to mention that my Spanish got a fine workout at today's conference. All but two of the presentations were given in Spanish, and I deliberately avoided the English-speaking table at lunch. So it was gratifying when one of the professors, upon hearing that I planned to take Spanish classes until mid-August, delivered himself of the opinion that I already "dominated" the language very well.

Gratifying?? Who are we kidding?? It was exhilarating, thrilling, a tremendous rush. So much so that I was composing little ditties in my head all the way home on the metro. I will spare you the full details, but phrases like "gonna conjugate, gonna dominate, gonna make Spanish my bitch" did feature...

The plain people of Ireland: You're getting quite a mouth on you this week, aren't you? Once again with the disrespectful language!
The management: Disrespectful, how, pray tell?
The plain people of Ireland: "Make Spanish my bitch". Sure that's very disrespectful to women.
The management: You say that because you think I am referring to "la lengua", a feminine noun.
The plain people of Ireland: Well...
The management: But, fools, I am doing no such thing. When I say "Spanish", clearly I am referring to "el idioma", or if you prefer, "el lenguaje", in all its masculine manliness. How, pray tell, is that disrespectul to women?

The plain people of Ireland: Now you're just twisting things around, and you know it.
The management: Sometimes it's just too irresistible, sabéis?

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