Saturday, August 16, 2008

I am 8 years old!!!

Hotel Colon

Or why else do I find this hotel name so hilarious?

I'm imagining a mystery story: "Revenge of the Colon". Chic young socialite Pamela Ffrench-Sealyham-Bassett, heiress to a large petfood-licorice-allsort conglomerate and her aristocratic fiancé, Geoffrey Ponsonby-Ffeatherstonehaugh (pronounced "Chumley"), 11th Earl of the Falklands, check in to the Hotel Colon, and are never heard from again. Could it be death from gradual meat intoxication, the inevitable result of a diet completely devoid of cruciferous vegetables? Or are there more sinister forces at work in the bowels of the Hotel Colon?

Why not buy the book (available soon in the famed "Malvinas Mysteries" series?) and find out for yourself?*

*Hollywood agents: please contact this blog directly to discuss screen treatment options.


Anonymous said...

Having once paid the equivalent of $4 in Brazil for a can of asparagus out of desperation for a vegetable, I hear your cruciferous pliant. Plates must be very meat-filled to challenge your well-known aversion to such plants. I literally dreamt about green beans, broccoli, zucchini, even iceberg lettuce. A trip to the supermercado might yield some frozen spinach perhaps or a package of carrots to balance all the meat and potatoes.

Won't describe my all-vegetable dinner tonight, inspired by this morning's trip to the farmers' market.

Pb [stands for peas and beans]

Anonymous said...

You are mixing up your Fanshaws and Chumleys!! Chumley is spelt Chomloundleigh or something similar. Emer

gaelstat said...

Actually, I think it's Cholmondley, but who's counting? Featherstonehaugh, Cholmondley - it's all symptomatic of too much inbreeding with a silver spoon in one's mouth.

I'd add a limerick, but then things would devolve into obscenity, and the Argentine internet cafe filters would never let me access my own blog again.

Son muy estrictos!!