Monday, September 28, 2009

Our muse it doth refuse to stop (WARNING! Doggerel Alert)

Damn you, anonymous challenger! This is the kind of thing that keeps some of us from sleeping, and I need my beauty sleep. But there's more:

Lines composed while brushing and flossing

If you should suffer from the caries,
Which often times cause for despair is,
Fear not for here in Buenos Aires,
The quality of dental care is
Very good, a thing that rare is
But not down here in Buenos Aires
The dentists, like benign tooth fairies
Will save your teeth from Raton Perez.
Cancel your trip to the Canaries!
And come on down to Buenos Aires.

I trust this doggerel is bad enough to meet any challenge.


Anonymous said...

O James McIntyre, my fellow Ontarian
You are the worst - I'm no contrarian
I'd rather eat some maggoty cheese
Than read your poetry if you please
Though David tries his mighty best
You leave him in the dust, and the rest
To be frank, average turds
Look better than your words
And they, at least will float
Unlike your words,which nothing connote
Still, I must admit a certain admiration
For your cheesy compilation
To be worst of the worst
Is, in a way, to be first
So here's to you, my fellow Ontarian
You are still the worst - I'm no contrarian

gaelstat said...

Well, dear Anonymous in Ontario, that's just one person's opinion, innit? And maybe, as an Ontarian, you are not the most objective of judges.

What do I have to do to get some recognition around here? Write doggerel about casu marzu?

I take personal pride in the awfulness of the line:

"Rain drizzles down like pee of fairies"

and submit that it is right down there with anything in the cheesy oeuvre of Senor McIntyre. So there!

Anonymous said...

In fairness, I have to say that you may not be the most objective of judges either, as a judge of your own doggerel. I don't think either of us can reach the depths of the cheesy Ontario. I may try again, however.